The "4 8 12 hug rule," popularized by family therapist Virginia Satir, suggests the number of hugs we need daily for emotional well-being: 4 for survival, 8 for maintenance, and 12 for growth. This highlights the importance of physical touch in our lives.
The Breakdown of the 4 8 12 Hug Rule
This rule, while not scientifically proven in a strict sense, emphasizes the profound impact of hugs and physical connection on our emotional and psychological health.
Four Hugs a Day for Survival
According to Satir, four hugs are the bare minimum needed to simply "get by." This suggests that without this level of physical affection, our emotional needs are not being adequately met.
Eight Hugs a Day for Maintenance
Eight hugs a day are considered necessary for maintenance, meaning they are enough to keep us emotionally balanced and stable. This level of physical touch helps to maintain our emotional health and well-being.
Twelve Hugs a Day for Growth
Twelve hugs a day are recommended for personal growth. This implies that an abundance of physical affection can foster emotional development, strengthen relationships, and improve overall well-being.
Why Are Hugs Important?
- Emotional Well-being: Hugs release oxytocin, often called the "cuddle hormone," which promotes feelings of bonding, trust, and relaxation.
- Stress Reduction: Physical touch can lower cortisol levels, reducing stress and anxiety.
- Improved Relationships: Hugs strengthen bonds and foster deeper connections with others.
- Physical Health: Some studies suggest that hugs can boost the immune system and improve cardiovascular health.
As author and family therapist Virginia Satir once said, “We need four hugs a day for survival. We need eight hugs a day for maintenance. We need 12 hugs a day for growth”.
