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How Do I Get My Daughter to Wear a Bra?

Published in Parenting Support 4 mins read

Encouraging your daughter to wear a bra involves understanding her perspective and gently guiding her towards understanding the benefits. Here’s how you can approach this:

Understanding the Hesitation

Before pushing the issue, it’s important to understand why your daughter might be resistant to wearing a bra. Possible reasons might include:

  • Discomfort: Bras can feel restrictive, especially if they are new or ill-fitting.
  • Self-Consciousness: She may feel awkward or that wearing a bra draws unwanted attention to her changing body.
  • Peer Pressure: She may be the only one in her friend group wearing a bra, or vice-versa.
  • Novelty: It’s a new garment, and new things can be intimidating, especially during puberty.

Steps to Encourage Bra-Wearing

Here's a step-by-step guide to encourage her to wear a bra:

  1. Start a Conversation: Begin by calmly discussing the changes she’s experiencing. This shows her you understand and are there for support.
  2. Explain the Benefits: Don't just tell her she has to wear a bra; explain why it can help.
    • Comfort: As mentioned by the reference, bras can actually provide comfort by supporting growing breasts, reducing tenderness and discomfort caused by movement.
    • Support: Explain that bras offer support which will become important as she gets more active.
    • Protection and modesty Bras provide an extra layer of protection and modesty, especially under thin clothing.
  3. Make it a Joint Activity: Go shopping together, letting her pick out bras she finds appealing in terms of style and comfort. This gives her a sense of control and ownership.
  4. Proper Fit is Key: Ensure the bra fits correctly by getting professionally measured or learning to measure properly at home. A bad fit is uncomfortable and may put her off bra wearing altogether. A good fit means:
    • The band should be snug but not restrictive.
    • The cups should fully enclose the breasts without spillage or gaps.
    • The straps should provide support without digging into her shoulders.
  5. Start Gradually: Don’t force her to wear a bra all day right away.
    • Encourage her to wear it for a few hours at home first.
    • Gradually increase the wear time as she gets comfortable.
  6. Be Patient: It may take time for her to get used to wearing a bra. Be patient and understanding. Don’t nag or ridicule her decisions.
  7. Reassure Her: Reassure her that these changes are natural and that you are there to support her every step of the way.
  8. Address Concerns: Listen to her concerns and address them. If a bra feels uncomfortable, explore different styles, materials, or sizes.
  9. Highlight Role Models: Share stories of other girls or women who have embraced bra-wearing, and how it helped them.

Example conversation starters

Here are some ways to initiate a conversation about bras:

  • “I’ve noticed that you’re developing, and I remember when I started wearing a bra, it helped me feel more comfortable.”
  • "Let's talk about bras. I know it's new, but it's a normal part of growing up and there are lots of comfy options now."
  • "I know wearing a bra might seem weird, but it can actually make your clothes fit better and help you feel more comfortable when you're active."

By being patient, understanding, and communicative, you can help your daughter comfortably navigate this new stage of her life. Remember, it’s about empowering her, not forcing her.

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