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Approaching the Conversation

Published in Relationship Advice 3 mins read

How Do I Tell My Boyfriend He Has Bad Oral Hygiene?

Addressing a partner's poor oral hygiene requires sensitivity and tact. Directness is important, but harshness is not. The goal is to express your concern constructively and encourage positive change.

Begin by emphasizing your love and affection. This creates a safe space for a potentially uncomfortable discussion. Then, clearly and calmly communicate your observation. Avoid judgmental language; focus on the impact on you.

Instead of: "Your breath is terrible!" or "You have bad oral hygiene!"

Try:

  • "I hope you don't mind me bringing this up, but I've noticed your breath sometimes has a bit of an odor. Have you been to the dentist recently?"
  • "I love you very much, and I want us to feel comfortable during intimacy. Sometimes your breath isn't as fresh as I'd like, and it's affecting our kissing. I'm worried you might have something going on that needs attention from a dentist."
  • "Sweetheart, I care deeply about you and our relationship. I've noticed something that I wanted to address gently. Sometimes, your breath isn't quite fresh, and I'm concerned about your oral health. Perhaps we could make a dentist appointment together?"

Remember to focus on the impact on you, not on directly criticizing him. For example, instead of saying "Your breath is disgusting," try saying, "Sometimes, when we kiss, I notice a smell that makes it less enjoyable for me."

Addressing Concerns

The problem might stem from underlying issues. Gently suggest he consult a dentist or doctor. Offer to go with him for support.

  • Examples: Suggest a specific solution: “I was thinking we could make a dentist appointment together next week.”
  • Practical insights: Frame your concern as a shared goal: “Let's find a way to keep both of us feeling great about our kisses!”

Important Considerations

  • Be patient: Change takes time. Celebrate small improvements and continue offering support.
  • Avoid blame: Focus on the issue, not his character.
  • Be empathetic: He might be embarrassed or unaware of the problem.
  • Consider the underlying causes: Poor oral hygiene can have underlying medical reasons.

Remember, open and honest communication is key to a healthy relationship. By approaching the subject with love and concern, you increase the chances of a positive resolution. If the problem persists despite your efforts, professional intervention might be necessary.

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