Love and possession are often confused, but they represent fundamentally different approaches to relationships. Love centers on care and wanting the best for another person, while possession focuses on control and ownership. According to the reference, possession is when "a partner cares more about you making them happy than offering no-strings-attached love and affection."
Defining Love vs. Possession
To clearly differentiate between the two, consider the following:
| Feature | Love | Possession |
|---|---|---|
| Core Value | Caring and support | Control and ownership |
| Motivation | Wanting the best for the other person | Satisfying one's own needs and insecurities |
| Behavior | Respectful and trusting | Controlling and jealous |
| Attachment | Secure and healthy | Anxious and insecure |
Key Differences Explained
- Motivation: Love is motivated by genuine care and concern for the well-being of the other person. Possession, on the other hand, is driven by a desire to control and own someone.
- Respect for Individuality: Love respects the other person's individuality, encouraging them to grow and pursue their own interests. Possession seeks to stifle individuality, demanding conformity to the possessor's desires.
- Trust: Love is built on trust, allowing for freedom and independence within the relationship. Possession is characterized by jealousy and suspicion, leading to controlling behaviors.
- Happiness Focus: According to the reference, a key difference is the focus of happiness. In love, the happiness of both individuals is important. In possession, the possessor prioritizes their own happiness, often at the expense of the other person.
Examples
- Loving behavior: Supporting a partner's career goals, even if it requires sacrifice; giving them space to spend time with friends; trusting them implicitly.
- Possessive behavior: Constantly checking a partner's phone; dictating who they can and cannot see; becoming jealous of their accomplishments; isolating them from their support network.
In conclusion, love fosters growth, independence, and mutual respect, while possession aims to restrict, control, and ultimately, diminish the other person. You cannot truly own a person, and attempts to do so are detrimental to any relationship.
